New generations of leaders are bringing different concerns to the workplace. They value work-life harmony and workplace well-being over pay, pension and benefits. Demystifying the myths of each generation and understanding their values will help communication and understanding in both personal and professional relationships and reduce intergenerational conflict. Leaders who understand and can effectively navigate these generational differences will add an essential skill to their leadership toolbox.
This was the focus of our “Navigating Generational Leadership” workshop for the Sarasota Women’s Alliance. Our panelists – Susan Bowie, William G. & Marie Selby Foundation President and CEO; Lauren Hughey, Mote Marine Laboratory & Aquarium Senior Major Gifts Officer; Anita Eldridge, Retired SVP of Finance & Administration at Sarasota-Manatee Airport and Christine Johnson, Conservation Foundation of Gulf Coast President — highlighted specific dimensions of intergenerational leadership they have faced in their workplace, and offered guidance to other leaders navigating through similar situations.
Communications Panelists emphasized the need to think about the intentions behind communications and to establish trust enough to know that your colleagues have good intentions, despite how they might be presented. Words, however, still matter. For example, when a donor says thank you, the intent behind the response “no problem” maybe “it’s okay, it was easy” which could come across as “whatever” to the donor.
In another example, a GenX leader who described her generation as the most independent generation has a ‘get it done’ approach to leadership. Her younger colleagues were direct and open with her, explaining that they wanted to be a part of the process, to understand so they could make better decisions. So now this leader says, “I’d like it done this way because __.”
Open communication and a bit of adaptation make all of these workplace situations work.
Vulnerability and Trust Where many Boomer leaders were raised to show they were tough, resulting in a ‘fake it until you make it’ style at work, Millennial leaders often demonstrate vulnerability which is important for eliciting trust and building authentic relationships.
Agility Many organizations are facing an aging workforce, at the same time, they are struggling to hire. One organization addressed both challenges with flexibility. They paired new employees with employees nearing retirement to ensure a smooth transition. Both generations learned from each other, and the employer prevented a potential HR crisis.
On the flip side, a Millennial leader, a self-proclaimed digital native, joined an organization with somewhat dated technology. Their process of going digital was challenging, but they were agile and reached out to talent versus a title with great success.
Panel facilitator and Stilettos & Sneakers President Janice Zarro concluded the workshop with a discussion about generation-specific sayings that have made their way into our workforce dictionaries. Here are two of the responses. Do you have any to add? We’d love to hear from you.
Act your wage = Don’t do more than what you are paid for
I think I’ll get a lazy girl job = 9 – 5, working from home or with an easy manager
Yiddish Speaking Great Grandmother in “Kiss My Ass” Could be Italian or from any other Ethnic Group
Stilettos and Sneakers often talks about the influence of the Italian American family. I fondly talk of my Italian immigrant grandmother’s unconditional love for me. She conveyed the very values I rely on today.
Arielle Goldman wrote and created the film “Kiss My Ass.” It is the story of Anna, who gets an abortion accompanied by the ghost of her Yiddish-speaking great-grandmother. The grandmother is with Anna throughout this difficult process offering humor, grandmotherly love, empathy, compassion, and kindness. It is from the living memories the film tenderly captures where Anna gets her strength, courage, and resilience.
The film’s title comes from a scene when Anna is solemnly leaving the clinic after having the abortion procedure, and she must walk a gauntlet of heckling protestors and those of us watching the film hear the Yiddish grandmother say to the disrupters, “Kiss My Ass.”
The 2023 Through Women’s Eyes International Film Festival, in its 24th year, was dedicated to showcasing women filmmakers and films that address issues important to women. The films often told women’s stories from all over the world, 300 films were submitted, and 38 films were selected. The festival was sponsored by Through Women’s Eyes, an advocacy organization dedicated to women’s rights and gender equality. It was said that the films this year emphasized passion through the stories told by women and about women.
One of the creators of the award-winning film #No Regrets, Kristine Artymowski felt it was important at this time to have women tell their stories of having an abortion prior to Roe vs. Wade. Kristine was inspired by Gen Z Paxton Smith, who was part of the film and whose high school valedictorian address in the state of Texas went viral when she spoke about her future without adequate healthcare protections. She said this war is on my right as a woman and the right to control my body. #No Regrets shows a multi-generational fight as women bridge the generational gap. This is exactly the mission of Stilettos and Sneakers! Kristine Artymowski’s advice as she accepted her award at the closing ceremony was “be feisty, be fierce.”
Through the life stories of Catholic sisters or nuns, they taught, inspired, and influenced the lives of so many children. I think of Sister Concetta and the other nuns at St. Francis Xavier Church in Newark, New Jersey, and during this month as we celebrate women, I thank you!
Dear Sister Concetta,
In your black habit and long dress, you terrified and inspired me. You taught me how to pray, obey, be good, and always aim to be holy. Respect for authority started with you and all the other nuns. You instilled those core values of self-discipline, the importance of listening, and the importance of being silent.
Thanks for those endless catechetical instructions making me memorize those rote prayers like the Our Father, Hail Mary, and so on. They sustained me through a multitude of crises in my youth and adolescence. It wasn’t until I became an adult did I learn to talk to God and put those rote prayers aside. But Sister Concetta, you and the other sisters gave me what I needed to survive.
The 2023 Women’s History Month theme is “Celebrate Women Who Tell Stories.” We are asked to think of authors, songwriters, performers, and grandmothers.
I think of my grandmother, Elizabeth Terreri Monaco. Her life story is my inspiration. She arrived from Pescopennataro, Italy, at sixteen as a young bride to my grandfather. She died, never seeing her mother or Italy again. In this thank you letter, I get to share all the memories I now cherish, for when she died, I was too young, at sixteen years of age, to understand or say thank you!
Dear Grandma,
You had four grandchildren, but I know I was your favorite. The baby of the family, you protected me from the teasing and taunts from my sister and cousins. Your hugs, kisses, and pure delight for everything I did, I still see and feel today. My love and appreciation for my Italian American values started with you.
It was the 1950’s Grandma, no supermarkets in your neighborhood. I can still feel you holding my little hand tightly as we walked to the small stores on Seventh Avenue in Newark, NJ buying cheese and seeing those cheeses hanging in the store window. I smell the aroma of freshly baked bread from the Italian bread store below the flat where you lived and feel the heat coming through the bread bag. I just loved spending time with you. Unconditional love, warmth, and how you valued and enjoyed the ordinary in life is your inspirational story to me.
You were a skilled seamstress. I remember the beautiful long dress you designed and made for me when I was a flower girl at seven years old. A fresh flower tiara with my bologna curls, and matching gloves, was the closest I would ever feel to being a princess. I treasure today the photo of me in that dress and feel the pride and love in your work and for me. Thank you for beginning my work ethic or what I have elevated more to being an unapologetic workaholic, which is so much a part of me.
Your holiday dinners and their special foods inspired me to value traditions, family, and a connection to the country you left at sixteen. No cook in the family has mastered your touch with roasted potatoes, polenta, or homemade pasta. However, we gather together every holiday with our handed down version of your delicacies, and I say thank you for having your story as part of my story.
The Honorable Henrietta Holsman Fore & Janice Zarro
Janice Zarro recently attended the IWF Visionary Leaders Celebration-50 years of Women Changing the World 1974-2024 in Washington, DC.
The gathering was to recognize the women that have made IWF a dynamic organization reflecting on the past fifty years and looking at the potential for the next fifty years. Janice listened to the Honorable Susan Rice, Domestic Policy Adviser to President Biden, former US Permanent Representative to the United Nations, and a National Security Council Adviser to the President, share her story of leadership challenges and her current role in the White House.
It was exciting for Janice to reunite with The Honorable Henrietta Holsman Fore, Chairman and CEO Holsman International, Senior Managing Partner Radiate Capital, and former Executive Director of UNICEF. Both worked together decades ago with a non-profit helping women in third-world countries secure loans for their small businesses. Ms. Fore briefed the members on the nexus of policy power and money.
Women attendees with H.E. Anthony Phillips Spencer, Ambassador of Trinidad and Tobago
Janice also attended a diplomatic dinner with H.E. Anthony Phillips Spencer, Ambassador of Trinidad and Tobago, with women attendees from Austria, Ireland, and the United States. The conversation was devoted to global challenges and the advancement of women’s leadership.
Linda R. Carlozzi and Lisa Regnante reflect on their experience with Janice as a mentor and the ways it impacted their lives.
Q. What was the most valuable from your mentoring experience?
LISA: I came of age watching Congresswoman Geraldine Ferraro nominated as the first woman Vice Presidential candidate in 1984. Her presence on the national stage provided a role model for young women like me – a second-generation Italian American interested in law and politics. I could relate to this “mentor” from afar.
During college, I met an Italian American lawyer who took a personal interest in me and became my mentor. She held a high-profile government affairs position with a Fortune 500 company in Washington, D.C., at a time when only two women held seats in the US Senate. I hit the mentor jackpot.
As my mentor was breaking her own glass ceilings, she made herself available to me. She shared her professional successes and failures without sugarcoating. As an active listener, she provided me with targeted career guidance and sisterly encouragement.
The most valuable part of the mentor relationship was the opportunity to ask questions without judgment. No question was off the table. “Ask away” she’d say. From wardrobe advice to navigating in a male-dominated workplace and everything in between, she shared her views with honesty and humor.
At a time before the internet, LinkedIn, or YouTube to consult, my mentor was, in a sense, my own personal “Google” search engine.
Now, from my vantage point as an empty nester whose kids are beginning their own careers, I can reflect on my mentee experience with reverence. It undoubtedly played an important part in my early professional life. It helped me find my own voice and style and gave me more confidence to succeed in the business world.
LINDA: I am a first-generation Italian American. I was paired with one of my mentors during law school because she was an accomplished Italian American woman lawyer working in Washington DC, where I was attending Law school. I didn’t have any lawyers in my family so, to me, the mentor relationship was incredibly valuable to learn first-hand about the different law paths that were available to me and opened my eyes to what possibilities existed for me.
Networking was foreign to me. So having a mentor was an incredible experience and opened another world for me.
The close relationship I enjoyed with my mentor – who looked like me and who shared my background – was incredible. She exposed me to an inside point of view of the paths I could take in the law field.
All these years later, having become a partner in a large law firm based in New York City, I have had the opportunity to mentor young attorneys, and I realize the value of the mentor relationship. I see myself in the young attorneys who are looking for guidance, and a good ear to listen to their dreams and concerns.
Q. What is one memorable moment or one thing you remember most impacting your professional career from our mentoring experience?
LINDA: My mentor opened my eyes to what is possible. I remember one of the first times I met the woman who would later become my mentor, I was impressed with her professionalism and demeanor. She presented the whole package! Intelligent, and well-spoken, and when she walked into the room, she captured everyone’s attention. After all these years, I can genuinely say, this remains true about my mentor, and it is something I still aspire to achieve. She was never afraid to share he honest opinion even when it may not have been the most popular opinion. Recently, a colleague called me after a somewhat difficult business meeting and said, she was impressed with how I presented my opinion, my arguments, and how I was able to persuade the room. I immediately thought of my mentor – some thirty years later, perhaps I have finally reached one of my goals.
LISA: My mentor served on the Board of Directors of a national organization. At the time, almost all Board rooms were dominated by men; women board members were still a minority, at best. The non-profit Board consisted of powerful businessmen, who were used to calling the shots, and in hindsight, likely new to working with women leaders.
When I joined my mentor at a board meeting for the first time, I had an opportunity to witness how she interacted with powerful men as their equal.
The meeting was illuminating. I watched what she wore, and how she walked confidently into the room taking a prime seat in the middle of the table. She knew how to make small talk before the meeting started.
She was undaunted when she was interrupted by voices louder and stronger than her own – and it happened often. I watched how she persisted when her ideas were shot down. Further, she strategically used a smile, laughter, or silence to make a point, while at the same time maintaining her authentic self.
What a lesson it was! One I could never gain in a classroom, from a book, or in conversation. It was the single most impactful experience I had as a mentee.
My mentor found a way to sit at the “head table” and seized the opportunity to learn and grow when she could have otherwise been comfortable sitting there quietly. In doing so, she paved the way for other women behind her to take more seats at that table.
The experience gave me the confidence to be more assertive and to successfully maneuver in new or uncomfortable situations.
Q. Is mentoring for millennials today of value and why?
LISA: Absolutely. Millennials understand the value of networking as they are steeped in LinkedIn and the social media culture. However, technology cannot replace a one-on-one personal relationship with a mentor.
Mentors can personally introduce mentees to their valued contacts. This can cut through the complicated world of establishing professional relationships and provide a much-needed focus to career pathing.
LINDA: One thousand times yes! Particularly for Millennials.
My impression of this generation is they want a fast-track career. They understand the value of networking. I don’t know if I did myself. They can be impacted by having a mentor. We have a mentorship program at my firm. I see first-hand how it impacts young attorneys. They understand the power of it and its value in it. They are very tuned in to making contacts and advancing their professional career. They are much better at networking than I was at their age. I think mentorship is still very important so they can see the many paths their careers can take.
She graduated from Fordham University (B.A., cum laude, 1985) and was awarded the degree of Juris Doctor by Catholic University, Columbus School of Law, Washington, D.C., in 1989. Ms. Carlozzi began her labor law career at the National Labor Relations Board, Office of Appeals in Washington D.C., and later transferred to the Philadelphia Region of the National Labor Relations Board prior to joining Jackson Lewis.
Ms. Carlozzi is a member of the American Bar Association, Labor & Employment Section, and serves as General Counsel and Chair of the Employee & Labor Relations Chair for the New York City Chapter of the Society for Human Resources Management (NYC SHRM). Ms. Carlozzi is a member of The Broadway League, Actor’s Fund, and several civic and community organizations.
Ms. Carlozzi has dedicated nearly forty years to the Italian American Community. Ms. Carlozzi currently serves as the Executive Vice President of Scholarships, Grants and Youth Engagement of the National Italian American Foundation (NIAF). In addition, she has served as past President and Chairwoman of the Italian Welfare League (“IWL”), a non-profit organization that serves Italian American children in medical need and emotional crisis. She has been a member of the Board of Directors for over twenty (20) years. The League has raised and distributed over $2,600,000 to thousands of Italian American children as well as providing grants to organizations assisting Italian American children. In addition, she previously served on the Board of Directors of the National Organization of Italian American Women from 2005 to 2009 and is a current member of NOIAW, and the Columbian Lawyers in New York.
About Lisa Regnante
Lisa Gueli Regnante is the Communication Manager at Buttonwood Financial Advisors. As a communications professional, she has over 30 years of experience in the finance, non-profit, and media sectors. She enjoys volunteering, traveling, and researching her family’s Italian ancestry. She lives in the Washington, DC metropolitan area with her husband Tom, where they raised their two sons, Charles and Thomas.
Mentoring: Is it time to Re-Evaluate and Re-Imagine?
For over three-plus decades, I have mentored women and one male law student. My title, the authority it conveyed, and my experience, were all that it seemed I needed to develop a mutual relationship of respect. I loved mentoring and assumed that since my mentees stayed in the arrangement, they were learning and found it beneficial.
Today, this baby boomer is reminded of Bob Dylan’s song “The Times They Are A Changin…” I reached out to female millennials and Gen Z’s, as to their thoughts and feelings on the value of mentoring. I now realize it may be time to re-evaluate and re-imagine mentoring.
Here is just a sample of what I heard and learned! Time is needed to develop trust between the mentor and mentee. Both parties must show mutual vulnerability. It is more important to have role models than mentors. We want to be engaged and need human interaction; we want more of an experience. Mentors need to give their time and energy. Mentoring has to feel authentic and not transactional. Mentoring should be considered an ROI (return on investment) for one’s career.
The word mentoring may be tired or old, but is the concept valid? Does the structure or nature of the mentor-mentee relationship need to be changed? Author Tara Mohr, in Playing Big says “Women are enjoined again and again to seek external resources to help their careers, but they aren’t encouraged as frequently to trust their own instincts and find answers inside. As part of this, women are endlessly told to seek “outer” mentors-other people who can show us the way, make connections and give us advice.” Is she right or wrong?
It is worth your time to read an article co-authored by two women I mentored decades ago. Both are terrific, professionally successful women whom I am proud to call my friends. Linda Carlozzi is a Principal at the law firm Jackson Lewis, P.C. and Lisa Regnante is a Digital Marketing Manager. I mentored Linda when she was in law school and Lisa when she was in college.
What resonated when reading their reflections on their mentoring experience is that what they observed and implicitly conveyed was remembered far more than any direct guidance or advice I gave.
Enjoy the read! I did. Mentoring deserves an inter-generational conversation?
Meeting and sharing ideas with multi-generational women leaders from all over the world are always a highlight of any International Women’s Forum World Leadership conference wherever in the world it takes place.
I talked with dynamic Australian women conference attendees who shared the elements of a women’s leadership journey program taking place in Australia. These women tell their stories of success around certain themes:
Values-how are your values reflected in your decision making?
Career Direction-Was it an opportunity or a strategic decision?
Mindset-What was your mindset during your career journey?
Connecting-How, when, and where did you make your connections?
For Stilettos and Sneakers, this was valuable input as we explore the best way for role models to establish trust taking the concept of mentoring to different dimensions.
Stilettos and Sneakers always likes to share tips on leadership to advance the empowerment of women. Sharing the leadership skills needed to tackle difficult, complex problems, Harvard Business School Professor and the Director of Harvard University’s Advanced Leadership Initiative, Rosabeth Moss Kanter shared:
Think outside the building or your organization
Dream bigger than you are
Takes a cross-sector, multi-stakeholder coalition
Everything can look like a failure in the middle
Optimism in activism: doing is what gives people hope
Radical thing to do is introduce people to each other
My favorite is “Everything can look like a failure in the middle” because the feelings of failure and how you cope are the mission of Stilettos and Sneakers.
